Tuesday, April 30, 2013

My (ha!) "Book"

So I've not posted for a while. That's not to say nothing's happened (although some sex would've been nice).

Instead I've hit a writing slipstream and am making actual progress on this 'book' I've been working on for several years. It's come and gone in several guises, starting with a variety of sketches and truly terrible chapters I shat out in my twenties, to a completed travelogue of my India trip back in 2001 that was pretty bad.

Okay, both were awful, bordering on evil. I still didn't learn and a few years ago I finished my first fictional novel - based on the principle of writing what you know. Clearly, what I knew was leaden characters, a vague plot, no real ending, a beginning of sorts, and a kind of wishy-washy middle. That had been enough to kill any dreams of my becoming a writer, leaving me to deal with the stale corpse of an aimless man that remained.

And then, waaaaay later and at the beginning of the year, I started to reorder this blog chronologically. I've since been merging all my real-life work together such as my India book and a travel blog to Asia, and everything else in between. Not only did I discover how truly eye-bleeding some of it was, I've improved and revamped it all into what I'm working on now:

My autobiography absolutely no-one's asked for.

I'm not quite half way through but seeing as I started to gain real momentum about a month ago, I've been charging ahead almost non-stop and it seems pretty solid and readable. I've also managed to ignore those voices in my head calling me a shitty piece of shitty-write-shit, so I'm on target to have a first draft done in the next couple of months.

And considering I'm such a pedant and I'm editing a hell of a lot - almost too much - as I go, my first draft is likely to need just one mighty sweep from beginning to end, so Draft Two will become Final and good to go around this summertime, middle to end-ish.

The plan is to self publish via Lulu or somesuch, with Kindle versions a la me old mate Martin.

I've taken writing what you know to an absurd level as I couldn't even invent a fictional white male Englishman with more personal issues than an... ugh, too early in the day to think... so this is all I've got....   This blog.... but new and improved and in order with a whole lotta narrative and progression 'n shit...

Coming soon.

I hope.


The Unbearable Banishment said...

I'll buy your fucking book. For real. Get busy. I need a beach read.

Z said...

I'll buy it too, of course. Good for you.

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

You're a good writer man - keep going! Get a good editor tho - every writer needs one. And don't take criticism personally. Hard I know, but if it's constructively meant it's probably useful. Good man.

Anonymous said...

That cat is really fat. Does it get any exercise? You know they need to roam, right?

Anonymous said...

Hurrah! Another purchaser here!

Peach said...

sounds good dude. drinks soon, please, long time need catch up x

luna said...

That's good news1

Are we gonna be in it??

luna said...

Already half a dozen pre sold books and you haven't written it yet!
not bad for an unpublished author!
But let me point out if we're in it that's an incentive, you know, a bit like "product placement" principle...;)

if you're basically copying your blog shouldn't you take it mostly off line/
in case someone steals it!

digressica said...

What I like best about this post, apart from obviously the fact that you're finally writing your effing book, is that phrase "a shitty piece of shitty-write-shit", which made me actually LOL. I am still LOLing a little bit.

digressica said...

How are you going with it, by the way?

Anonymous said...

British Gal does Tokyo (me) says:
why not try to get a agent and publish it with a publishing house?
Keep self-publishing as a fall-back option.
You write well, are funny, and are eminently publishable.

fwengebola said...

UB ~ Ahaha, thank you. And clearly this ain't gonna be a beach read just yet.
Z ~ Thank you Z. It's still needing a re-write and at this stage not there yet.
Anon ~ Thank you and your blasphemy
Anon ~ And thank you. It's being proofed at the mo by a few friends
Anon ~ I swear it's mostly fur
loob ~ Shit's gettin' real. Thanks. I still can't believe it could happen. Not sure myself yet.
Peach ~ Hullo, sure, let me know. Been off the grid obviously quite a bit.
Luna ~ Yes. You are down as "some commentators". If this is happening, and the odds have improved, I will likely have a thanks page. You will be in it. In some kind of font. I am thinking of deleting quite a few posts but this damn thing is quite different to the blog in that it's a standalone, uh, book.
Dig ~ Well the fact it's taken me over 4 months should give you a hint. I'm really sorry about that. Thank you, and it's nearly done. You have to keep going with yours! You need to feel that same strange sense of achievement and emptiness.
BGDT ~ Oh hello. Where do you blog now? I can't find you. Thank you, of course, and I am going via Lulu first, then e-booking it, or something. I will be sending a hard copy to at least one publisher. They'll need toilet paper.

Thank you and goodnight!