Thursday, August 16, 2007

The God of Misery

I've just out-tramped a Tramp. I was in my local newsagents, buying a copy of the Evening Standard for Large Northern Flatmate, and a packet of fags for me. Said Tramp was just walking out, having bought himself a 4-pack of Tennants Extra Strength Obliterator.

He turned to me and yelled, 'You gotta larf, eh?'

'Why?' I replied.

I am a Cappo Di Tutti Cunt.

15 comments:

dave fishwick said...

Whilst living in the US of A, desperation forced me (with a gun to my head) into buying booze off a tramp. Actually, aren't they called hobos there?

Angela-la-la said...

He may laugh, ol' trampytits - he doesn't have to put up with your 'aww, I 'ave 'ad zuch a hard life it iz all I can do to torment ze world wiz techno' neighbour...

la fille mariƩe said...

I think you should have larfed. Whatever that is. Must be some British thing.

Oh! Look at your word verification. Like an orgasm followed by a sudden fall down the stairs.

ooolpod

actonb said...

Hee!

You are a grumpy git aren't you?!

Has the techno-torture really sapped your will to live?

Peach said...

hope he shared some of his delicious brew with you?

having my cake said...

You are a boss of all cunts? Strictly speaking, shouldnt that read Cappo di Tutti Cunti? If you can actually Latinise Anglo Saxon. Call me pedantic but I had this beef with the last series of Rome where they used fuck and cunt in virtually every scene. Didn't the Anglo Saxons come after the Romans? Well, they certainly did when I studied history.

choppertramp said...

Whoah, let's get this straight here. I actually said "I've had a bath. Yay!" etc etc

luna said...

Fille Mariee, or the sound of the old geezer conking out on top of his missus in a moment of release...

Anonymous said...

Why is 'cunt' such a derogatory term? After all, 'tis a useful thing.....

isabelle said...

ooh, the world made me jump then...did you just add that?

“A cynic can chill and dishearten with a single word”

I preferred your bedside manner from the previous post...

fwengebola said...

DF ~ Someone put a gun to your head and made you buy booze off a tramp? Sorry, Hobo?
Ang ~ True, but he may have other issues. Like no house to live in, and alcoholism.
LFM ~ Larf. Like laugh, but more accurately pronounced.
And why do you get all the odd WVs?
Act ~ My grumpiness has only just dawned on you? 'God of Misery' was a sobriquet applied to me at my last job.
Peach ~ Bleach would taste better.
HMC ~ Yes, Cunti is better. Perhaps Cunto di Tutti Cunti would've sufficed all round.
Technically, the Angles and the Saxons would've been milling about at the same time as the Romans. They just hadn't merged en masse in Britain until after the Romans had left, so you're right there.
And as far as I can ascertain, the use of 'fuck' and 'cunt' in Rome the TV series made perfect sense, what with all the actors speaking English. Otherwise they'd've said Futuo and Cunnus. (Yes, I had to look that up.)
CT ~ Oh very good.
Luna ~ What old geezer?
Anon ~ I don't use it enough, in my opinion.
Is ~ Yep, although I've since tinkered around and tidied it up.
Hmm, perhaps I ought to calm down.

Day Dreamer said...

Right. That's more like it!

having my cake said...

LMAO Cunto di tutti cunti! Now that really is a great tagline for a blog :)

luna said...

Ozzie, who else ! *roll eyes*

fwengebola said...

DD ~ Erm, yes, ok.
HMC ~ I may change my header for that.
Lune ~ I see.