The twilight zone between Christmas and New Year. Large Northern Flatmate is still up north til Sunday and I have an empty flat to myself.
This morning I woke up hungry, a sensation I haven't felt for about three days, so I had a celebratory omlette at my local cafe where a blonde Russian woman may or may not have been eyeing me up, I'm not sure. I had gone to bed at 6am as I had spent the previous evening in a lovely little pub with Phil, Natalie, and a real fire. When I got home, I accidentally drank a godawful bottle of Hungarian red.
The Hungarians aren't known for their good reds.
Or good whites.
Or good rosé wine, for that matter.
And half way through downing that while trying to find something vaguely interesting among 15 billion webpages, I may have accidentally walked to my local newsagents at 4am and somehow bought some hardcore European pornography.
This morning, my lovely ex-girlfriend from New York called to say she was now standing in Kensington and should we meet up? I said yes. She came round. I forgot how pretty and cute and intelligent she is. I cuddled her while she cried. I apologized for dumping her as the whole 'Long Distance' thing was proving to be hard work and it seemed sensible to end it. We cuddled some more. Cuddles turned to kisses. Then we paused to chat. Then we were overcome with something or other and went back to kissing and ended up on the floor. Then she started crying again and we went back to cuddling. Throughout she declined the opportunity to thumb through some hardcore European pornography.
Then she left, saying 'Remember I still love you', so I mumbled that I like her and coughed a bit.
And with that, she left to go back to her boyfriend.
Oh, I left that bit out. She's flown over with her current boyfriend and told him she wanted some time to go shopping by herself, then came over to see me instead. The guilt I've got is considerably larger than the wasted hard-on I had trying to unzip itself from within my jeans a few hours ago.
My Mum phoned before my ex arrived and I told the scenario. Her half-hearted advice? "Make hay while the sun shines." Honestly. That woman's indifference to my love life is remarkable. A quite unique situation, I thought, and her advice is for me to help someone to cheat, told via a fucking farming analogy.